Legacy

I never wrote a eulogy  for my father's funeral. I've written speeches for weddings, for school committees for award ceremonies. I write and I speak, its what I do. And yet, I couldn't do it for my Dad. It was too much, it happened too fast, our relationship was too complicated and I just couldn't write. Honestly, this is probably the biggest regret that I have. Words left unsaid.

I imagine that's why this TedX talk spoke to me as it did. I watched in Saturday morning and just loved it.

What will your legacy be? A seed was planted. Click on the link to watch this fabulous Ted talk. 
   https://youtu.be/xYmUg3I8jdQ

Fast forward a few hours and I'm at a spin class. The song "Turn Down For What" by DJ Snake (who?? I totally had to google to find out that info!)came on and I was jammin. "Yeah" I thought to myself-" why should we turn down (our thoughts, beliefs, words, selves) we need to turn UP!" 

I thought of how this connected to my legacy. It struck me, there in the dark, on a spin bike, sweating like a pig-what I want my legacy to be- Living Out Loud.

Saying the things, doing the things, believing in the things and doing it all out loud.

There seems to be a tendency to edit ones' self depending on the audience and situation and while that can be wise, at times. It can also begin to feel inauthentic.

This group of people believes this- so I won't tell them I believe in the opposite.

That group of people behaves like that- so I need to behave like that when I'm with them. 

 
But if we're talking about legacy, if we're talking about how we want to live- to be remembered- to exists in this world- doesn't that matter MORE than what other people think?

I've always been an out loud kind of a person. But now, now with a little more wisdom and a little more time, I want to Live Out Loud with grace, with compassion, with love.

THAT is the legacy I want to leave. THAT is the path I want to walk and the example I want to set.
There is only one me and I've only got one life- so I might as well Live it Out Loud.

What kind of legacy would my father have wanted to leave? Because I didn't speak at his funeral, I was able to listen. I listened to countless stories about him from countless people. 

 I was not able to speak to his legacy that day, but I heard it anyway.